Shame lives in that fuzzy space between our original desire to create harmony and our ultimate comprehension that we’ve been conned.

I’ve been scammed a couple of times. Notably by taxi drivers. Who hasn’t? Once in Paris and the other time in New York City. The scammers were good both…


Salope*

Ted’s one-stop-shop-concept for all of his occasions.

Salope was by far Ted’s favorite word. He used it as a compliment and as a critique. A double edged sword. …


I’m still afraid of Ted. Abusers are like that. They never go away. But only survivors can tell their stories.

Looking back now I realize how his frenzy and his fun masked the fear… like those crappy colored clouds of smog hanging over world capitals that we try to forget…


When telling the truth evokes a bigger sense of justice than a court of law could perhaps ever offer.

Justice /ˈdʒʌs.tis/ noun.

Fairness in the way people are treated. The quality of being reasonable, principled and unbiased… Equitableness, impartiality or moral rightness

Justice is certainly many things to many people……


How power and subordination get whipped into a sex-in-the-city-sauce that seems accommodating… but isn’t.

My encounter with The Attorney wasn’t like the others. He was another powerful man and I was in a compromising situation again, but what made this experience with The Attorney totally different was that I really…


The lengths to which women in compromising situations go … to sidestep or to confront the insistence of powerful men.

I worked for The Boss for about 6 months during the rainiest and greyest Parisian winter I can recall, following just on the heels of my encounter with The AdMan…


Importuner : When an older man’s fantasy about a very young woman… drives him to make it happen… with or without consent.

At that time, there were patrols and stamps and lines and barriers… at every crossing, on each side of the borders of every country. Always grey. Always menacing…


Addressing sexual abuses, trauma and our gendered roles in society through Restorative Justice is a big step in the right direction.

I ran into one of my ‘hims’ before Covid.

He’s a Rotary club member in a small rural town and the Rotary Club runs the Tulips Against Cancer sale…


I want to tell your truth about your abuse and give you a platform to publicize it… So that you can move on to your next stage of healing…

When #MeToo happened, I was in Los Angeles and my reaction was, “Whew!!!”

Like finally the cat was out of the…


A foray into the audience’s responsibility… Is the instigator always the sole culprit? Or are his followers liable too? If only for believing?

“Connivence” [kɔ(n)nivɑ ̃:s] is one of those words which, pronounced in French, sounds so beautiful, but it’s actually not.

It’s really a very sharp, three pronged fork…

Eva After

One woman’s navigation, survival and healing within the biased rules and gender expectations of a masculinized, patriarchal society.

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